"Reflections on Art | by Samer Farha
Going all the way back to my days in television, I’ve been more interested in being behind the camera than being in front of it and a large part of the reason is that I don’t really like pictures of me.
I suppose most people at some point in their lives wind up disliking something about their self image. People don’t like hearing their own voice, for instance. They don’t like seeing their picture, even when others consider it art. God help them if they spot themselves on television.
I don’t know enough about psychology (and, frankly, neither do the psychologists) to tell you why this is. But people do become more comfortable with more exposure. When you do radio or television, even if it is rarely, you have to get used to seeing and hearing yourself. It’s like walking in front of the mirror. You get used to it, even if you don’t totally approve of what you see.
As I’ve befriended more photographers, and as I’ve gone to more and more Flickr outings, I find that I’ve had to become more comfortable with my image. Photography outings are as much about the portrait taking opportunities as they are about discussions on art or the drinking of beer. Pictures of me pop up here and there on the site, and I find that I cringe less and less.
Partly, this is because I’m more comfortable with who I am than I’ve ever been in my life. Partly, this is because of the “mirror effect”. Partly, it helps that many of the photographers are very talented and make me look good. But, on top of that, I also get to see more than a single view of me. Rather than one static picture portraying whatever state I was in, I can see changes over time. Like a documentary, but lived out over several months.
Because of my comfort, a smidgen of narcissism, and because I want to document my life over this year of change, I’ve decided to start doing a 365 project. The concept is simple: take and post a self image once a day for a year. I won’t always make the deadline, but I will try and make it up.
This is going to be a year of change and reflection: the new president and his agenda; work is becoming more challenging; plans for a more sustained push into photography and programming; my 40th birthday. It all adds up, and it all warrants documenting. Piece by piece.
